So nagising ako ng 2am at hinde nako nakatulog ulit! Pero I’ve never felt more alive…by 3:30 shanna my younger sister woke up too, (maaga kasi kame nagsipagtulog! But normally mga bampira kame!)so ayun, by 4:15 si daddy naman nagising, napansin ata niya ilaw sa room namin ni shanna, anyway, ayun sabi ni dad since Shanna and I are both hungry na magluto nga daw kame…so we did, ako Japanese instant noodles yung niluto ko, which is also hard kase diko mabasa yung instruction, aba yung mga laging instant lang ang niluluto ang pwedeng makagawa nito ng maayos haha or so I said…(defensive ako e! OO na di nako marunong magluto, get off my back will yah?!)
While we are cooking, or pretending to cook, haha whatever, infairness Shanna knows how too cook better than me, we listened to Shanna’s Playlist ‘The Before I go to sleep playlist’ and one of the song there is Make Love by Bigbang and I always thought the lyrics goes like this:
Give me that happiness I gave to you just being there
And I fell in love with that line for bunch of reasons like for one, that particular line shows the mutual feelings between two people, 2nd I guess it’s because I’ve never really encountered a song that somehow show that you are sure of the other person’s feelings about you without being Boastful (mas bagay ang word na MAYABANG!) but simply being happy and secure, the other reasons I don’t think I will be able to articulate and there’s one more that only bella would understand so never mind explaining.
But unfortunately I thought wrong the Correct Lyrics is this:
Give me that happiness I get from you just being there
Which is commonly found thought in most songs with the same theme. Oh well I’m quite disappointed but I still love the song.
Moving on…after we cooked our breakfast, while eating Shanna chooses to drink juice instead of milk or hot choco, I drink water. So Shanna opened the apple flavored juice that have picture of the tiger, while looking at the picture she realize how the tiger drawn in the picture poses, it’s like a human girl’s “cam whore’ pose! the tiger’s lips is in a pout, so shanna got all excited and told me, ‘take my picture with the tiger, I’ll translate the tiger's pose into human pose!’ So I hope the picture will work, that pretty much concludes my day before going to school, speaking of school I had a miserable one outwardly way but happy inside, sort of thing… it’s like you want to tell the day ‘You can’t bring me down even if I am walking in the rain right now, I’m quite contented. I’m sorry but today I win!’ so I don’t have a paper and I have a quiz but who cares?! And so the day went on giving me misfortune but I didn’t care and now I realize wow, normally I would have been sad so sabi nga ni Shanna kiber!! I’m just happy I took it in stride. I gotta go, male-late nako sa school…haha!
Henry James compares experience to a kind of huge spider’s web suspended in the chamber of consciousness and capable of trapping not only what is necessary, but every air-borne particle as well.
Often what we call ‘experience’ is merely the sum of our defeats. Thus we look ahead with the fear of someone who has already made a lot of mistakes in life and we lack the courage to take the next step.
At such moments, it is good to remember the words of Lord Salisbury: ‘if you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome: if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent: if you believe the soldiers, nothing is safe.’
It is important to accept one’s passions, and not to lose one’s enthusiasm for conquest. They are part of life, and bring joy to all who participate in them. The warrior of light never loses sight of what endures, nor of bonds forged overtime. He knows how to distinguish between the transient and the enduring. There comes a moment, however, when his passions suddenly disappear. Despite all his knowledge, he allows himself to be overwhelmed by despair: from one moment to the next, his faith is not what it was, things do not happen as he dreamed they would, tragedies occur in unfair and unexpected ways, and he begins to believe that his prayers are not being heeded. He continues to pray and to attend religious services, but he cannot deceive himself: his heart does not respond as it once did, and the words seem meaningless.
At such a moment, there is only one possible path to follow: keep practicing. Say your prayers out of duty or fear, or for some other reason, but keep praying. Keep on, even if all seems in vain.
The angel in charge of receiving your words, and who is also responsible for the joy of faith, has wandered off somewhere. However, he will soon be back and will only know here to find you if he or she hears a prayer or a request from your lips.
According to legend, after an exhausting morning session of prayer in the monastery of Piedra, the novice asked the abbot if prayers brought God closer to mankind.
‘I’m going to reply with another question,’ said the abbot. ‘Will all the prayers you say make sun rise tomorrow?’
‘Of course not! The sun rises in obedience to a universal law.’
‘Well, there’s the answer to your question. God is close to us regardless of how much we pray.’
The novice was shocked.
‘Are you saying that our prayers are useless?’
‘Absolutely not. If you don’t wake up early enough, you will never get to see the sunrise. And although God is always close, if you don’t pray, you will never manage to fell His presence.’
Watch and pray: That should be the warrior of light’s motto. If he only watches, he will start to see ghosts where they don’t exist. If he only prays, he will not have time to carry out the work that the world so desperately needs.
According to another legend, this time from the Verba Seniorum, the abbot pastor used to say that Abbot John has prayed so much that he need no longer worry – all his passions had been vanquished.
The abbot pastor’s words reached the ears of one of the wise men in the monastery of Sceta. He called together the novices after supper.
‘You may have heard it said that Abbot John has no more temptations to conquer,’ he said. ‘However, a lack of struggle weakens the soul. Let us ask the Lord to send Abbot John a great temptation, and if he manages to conquer it, let us ask the Lord to send him another, and another. And when he is once more struggling against temptations, let us pray that he may never say: “Lord, remove this demon from me.” Let us pray that he asks: “Lord, give me strength to confront evil.”
-Like the Flowing River by Paulo Coelho-
